


Roll Over Me

by estriel



Series: August Break 2019 [6]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Boys In Love, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2019-08-07
Packaged: 2020-08-11 14:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20155411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/estriel/pseuds/estriel
Summary: Javi gets to Toronto. He's finally telling Yuzu how he feels... unless he chickens out.





	Roll Over Me

**Author's Note:**

> Today's prompt is _human_. 
> 
> This is a continuation of yesterday's [Loveletters](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20140372), so if you haven't, read that one first.

People often forget that Yuzu is just a human. True, it is hard to believe sometimes, especially when he is moving like that: a vision on the ice, his every movement a study in beauty and perfection.

Javi stares, like he has been doing every day during these past two weeks in Toronto. He helps with coaching the young kids, then stays behind for Yuzu’s session, watching from the cafeteria, slack-jawed and smitten. It never gets old. In moments like these, even he has to actively remind himself that Yuzu is not, in fact, some invincible god that transcends the sport.

Then Yuzu crashes, losing his footing on a quad sal once again, and Javi snaps out of his reverie. Suddenly, Yuzu is just… Yuzu. Just a man, just an athlete pushing himself to the limit, or beyond. Suddenly, Yuzu is vulnerable, fragile, tired. In that moment, Yuzu is just human… just the person Javi is helplessly in love with.

Yuzu rolls over onto his back, knees bent, the heels of his blades digging into the ice. Unlike the previous days, though, he doesn’t get up this time. Instead, Yuzu starts sobbing, his chest and stomach heaving as he lies there, arms spread out on the ice and his hair fanned out around his head like a dark halo.

Javi barely stops himself from stumbling out of the cafeteria and into the rink in that moment. He _should_, he _needs to_ do something. But then Tracy is there, squatting down next to Yuzu, talking to him, pulling him back up to his feet.

Yuzu is in good hands. And Javi is a coward.

Well, maybe not exactly. It’s just… Admitting his love for Yuzu to himself while reading interviews or watching videos is one thing. Admitting it to Yuzu, face to face, is another thing entirely.

Javi has been in Toronto for two weeks now. It has been fun, sharing a hug here, a smile there. But he still hasn’t said what he came here to say. He tells himself it’s not the right opportunity, that Yuzu is training for Worlds, that maybe he should wait with his confession so as not to distract Yuzu. But there never is the perfect opportunity, not with Yuzu’s schedule, and Javi’s fears, and their shared past. Besides, Javi is sick of waiting. He needs to do this.

Yuzu looks so worn around the edges when he emerges from the lockers some twenty minutes later that Javi nearly loses his nerve once again. He almost feels like he should leave Yuzu in this bubble of his, keep his distance… Be Sisyphus again and push his emotions away for another while.

But then he reminds himself once again that Yuzu is just a man.

He is probably lonely – he always has been, in a way, isolating himself from everyone, even from Javi, sometimes. He is also clearly cracking under the pressure of injury, of the expectations of a whole nation, of his _own_ impossible standards.

Yuzu is a just a man – a crazy, inspiring, amazing man. It is up to Javi to prove that he can, indeed, be the pillar of support Yuzu believes him to be.

*

In the end, it is not so hard.

Inviting Yuzu over for some tea. Walking with him, conversing lightly about skating, joking about Brian’s progressing hairloss all the way to Javi’s AirB’n’B. Watching Yuzu sigh contentedly when he sinks into the comfortable sofa, then gives Javi an apologetic grin as he throws his socked feet up onto the chaise longue.

The AirB’n’B is one of these minimalist but cosy places, all light-colored furniture, decorative pillows, and large potted plants in woven baskets placed strategically throughout the space. It must cost a fortune to rent in the summer, but Toronto is not exactly a tourist hotspot during the winter, so the price Javi is paying is more than reasonable. The view is spectacular now in the evening, Toronto’s twinkling streets laid out in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows in the living room.

Javi likes the place. He likes it even more with Yuzu in it.

He makes the tea and joins Yuzu on the sofa, sitting a polite distance away, suddenly insecure.

“Thank you,” Yuzu says as he accepts his mug. “Good tea,” he hums in approval once he takes a careful sip.

“I got it for you,” Javi mumbles, then blushes and ducks his gaze when Yuzu’s eyes widen in surprise.

They lapse into silence, and despite Javi’s revealing comment, it is a comfortable one. When he looks up, though, Javi notices that Yuzu is all tense, and there is that expression on his face that he always gets when he’s making plans in his head, or thinking of how he can score better at his next competition.

“Stop it,” Javi says and Yuzu looks at him.

  
“Stop what?” he asks.

“The thinking,” Javi says. Normally, he would throw in a joke to cheer Yuzu up. But he has a feeling Yuzu is too tired for jokes, physically, but mostly mentally. “Get out of your head. Relax,” Javi tells him.

Yuzu nods, sighs. “Is hard. You know I always think too much.”

“I know,” Javi concedes. It had been a continuous work in progress for Brian, and the sports psychologist he sent them both to, to get Yuzu to think less, and Javi to think more. Yuzu had seemed to be doing better but now… he seems more wound up than Javi remembers from their last year training together. “Come here,” he says, running on instinct, trusting the little voice inside him that tells him that he can, maybe, help a little.

He doesn’t wait for Yuzu’s answer, just shuffles closer on the couch and nudges Yuzu so he scoots a bit further down the chaise longue. Then Javi sits behind him. Yuzu gives Javi a quizzical look over his shoulder, but doesn’t stop him, for which Javi is grateful. This is a lot more intimate than they have been in a long time, or ever, he realizes, and his heartbeat flutters.

Still, there’s nothing about it, just a bit of… support. He lifts his hands to Yuzu’s shoulders and starts kneading.

Yuzu tenses up for a second, clearly surprised, then lets out a quiet sound, and goes as soft as a newborn kitten under Javi’s touch. Javi smiles, satisfied. It feels good to find the vicious knots in Yuzu’s muscles and work them out one by one, not in the rather painful way the massage therapist at Cricket does, but slowly, gently, pleasantly.

By the time he’s done, Yuzu is half leaning against him, relaxed and heavy with what Javi is sure is bone-deep exhaustion. He takes a breath, and gathers his courage. Then he wraps his arms around Yuzu’s torso and pulls him back into his chest, leaning them both back until his back hits the backrest, with Yuzu nestled comfortably against his chest.

“Yuzu,” he says, and Yuzu tips his head back, onto Javi’s shoulder, eyes soft and sleepy. “I – um – “ he tries to go on, but his mind is distracted, what with Yuzu so close and looking at him like that, like he doesn’t mind in the slightest that he’s cocooned in Javi’s embrace, that Javi is holding him in a way that is decidedly more than friendly. Javi suddenly realizes that Yuzu can probably feel his heartbeat, too, that he can tell how erratic it is.

Then Yuzu lifts his hand and cups one of Javi’s, guiding Javi until his palm is splayed right above Yuzu’s heart, just as wild under Yuzu’s thin t-shirt as Javi’s own is.

“Yes?” Yuzu prompts then, his voice deeper than usual, and Javi can feel it reverberate in Yuzu’s chest.

Emboldened, Javi tries again: “I did not come to Toronto to coach the kids,” he says and Yuzu rewards him with a smile.

“I know,” he says, watching Javi through his eyelashes. For a moment, Javi thinks he won’t have to say anything more, but Yuzu being Yuzu, he never stops at _almost there_. “Why _did_ you come?”

It’s scary. But Yuzu is warm in his arms, and he smells like a dream – warm citruses and herbs, and Javi has come all the way from Spain for this, hasn’t he? He’s not letting it slip away, not anymore.

“I missed you,” he admits the easier part of the truth.

Yuzu nods, mumbling, “Me too,” and giving Javi’s hand an encouraging squeeze. Javi really doesn’t know why Yuzu would consider him a support, when it is always him shoring Javi up, and not the other way around. Yuzu is always so brave. Javi loves that about him. Still, he needs to do better, he wants to do better.

“And I – I want to be here. For you. With you,” he starts, stumbling over his words and feeling like a blushing 16-year old with a crush. Except this is more, so much more, than an impulsive crush. “I want to be with you,” he finally manages. He lifts the hand that is not entwined with Yuzu’s, and threads it gently through Yuzu’s dark hair. “I want to be with you,” he repeats, pushing a few strands behind Yuzu’s ear.

Yuzu smiles again, and this time it is a playful one. “Why?” he asks. His eyes are twinkling. He’s beautiful.

Javi groans, then laughs a little. “You’re really going to make me say it, aren’t you?” he asks and lets his hand trail down the side of Yuzu’s neck. Yuzu shivers at the touch, but doesn’t take his eyes off Javi’s.

“I waited a long time for you to say,” he says. “So yes,” he adds, grin growing wider. But before Javi can even shake his head at Yuzu’s cheekiness, Yuzu winks, and goes on. “Or you can kiss me. Also works.”

Javi stares. Smiles so wide it hurts. And then he does as he is told, leaning down and pressing his lips against Yuzu’s. Because Yuzu may be just human, but it is still impossible to say no to him. Not that Javi wants to. He is done pushing away that boulder. He will gladly let it wreak wonderful havoc in his life as it rolls down over him.


End file.
